Balancing Grief and Work After Child Loss: 7 Gentle Strategies

Returning to work after losing a child is one of the most difficult transitions a bereaved mother can face. Grief doesn’t follow a schedule, and “getting back to normal” often feels impossible when your heart is still broken.

In this blog, you'll find compassionate and practical strategies to help you navigate the workplace while carrying deep grief.

The Reality of Grief Brain at Work

After child loss, it’s common to feel foggy, forgetful, and emotionally overwhelmed. This is often referred to as grief brain—and it’s real. Many grieving mothers find it difficult to concentrate, remember simple tasks, or feel motivated to perform in the ways they used to.

I remember missing meetings, losing track of emails, and crying in the staff bathroom more times than I can count. Grief stripped away my mental clarity.

Here are seven strategies that helped me show up while grieving and may help you do the same:

1. Support Your Grief Brain

If your memory and focus are unreliable right now, give yourself tools that lighten the mental load:

• Keep a notebook or app handy to jot down to-do’s, reminders, and names.

• Use simple checklists to break things down.

• Write everything down—even what seems obvious.

Don’t expect your brain to work the way it did before. A lot has changed, so we need extra tools.

2. Try the Pomodoro Method to Regain Focus

Use this method to stay present without pushing yourself too hard:

• Set a timer for 15–25 minutes of focused work.

• Then take a 5-minute break.

• After 2–3 rounds, take a longer rest.

  
  

3. Limit Sensory Overload

Grief can make you extra sensitive to light, sound, and distractions:

• Silence phone and computer notifications.

• Wear noise-canceling headphones or listen to calming music.

• Create a minimal, clutter-free workspace if possible.

These small changes can bring down your stress level throughout the day.

Lisa's book

4. Use Grounding Techniques

Help your nervous system stay steady with simple grounding practices:

• Take three slow, deep breaths.

• Sip cold water or touch something textured.

• Step outside or walk to a quiet spot when you feel overwhelmed.

These mini-pauses can make a big difference in your ability to cope.

5. Start With the Easiest Task

Sometimes just getting started is the hardest part. Begin with something small:

• Reply to a simple email.

• File a document.

• Organize your desk.

This creates forward motion and helps your brain feel capable again—without demanding too much.

6. Create Gentle Routines

Structure can be soothing when life feels chaotic:

• Begin and end your day with predictable rituals.

• Take a short walk on your break.

Even loose routines can create a sense of safety and stability when everything else feels uncertain.

7. Redefine What Productivity Looks Like after Child Loss

You may not be operating at full capacity—and that’s completely normal.

• Remind yourself that showing up at all is an act of strength.

• If possible, talk with your manager about flexible options: reduced hours, remote work, or temporary reassignment.

• Use available grief support resources like an Employee & Family Assistance Program (EFAP) if offered.

  
  

Think of grief like an injury—your mind and body both need time to heal.

Final Thoughts for Grieving Moms at Work

Going back to work after the loss of a child is a deeply personal and emotional journey. Some days will feel impossible. Others may surprise you. Allow yourself grace and space to feel everything that comes up—without judgment.

You are doing something incredibly hard, and there is no roadmap. These gentle strategies aren’t about being more productive; they’re about helping you function and survive during the hardest season of your life. Listen to the full podcast episode HERE.